I believe everyone has at least compromised once in their lifetime. And to me, sometimes compromising something can be really hard and tough.
“Compromise is a word found only in the vocabulary of those who have no will to fight.” – Josemaría Escrivá.
Yes it might seems like a cowardy act to some but it takes alot more than that to compromise. Sometimes people compromise to not lose the person they truly love. Sometimes people compromise because they dont want to get into a fight. Some of them compromise because they want peace. There are many reasons why people compromises.
I personally suck at compromising. Because I usually want what I want and settles for nothing less. And of course because of my metality, I lose out alot. And I started learning the art of compromising. And one of the keys to having a good and healthy relationship is learning to compromise. (Not just relationships, friendships too)
“Compromise is what binds people together. Compromise is sharing and conciliatory, it is loving and kind and unselfish.” – Ali Harris
You see? Everyone has different views on compromising.
To me it mainly says that you are willing to give way and take lesser than what you want in order not to hurt the other party. Having said that I am still learning how to compromise everyday. My other half is rather good at compromising to me. He lets me choose what to eat rather than he decides, because he says I’m better at making decisions. We learn to meet in the middle as time goes by. I have yet to really meet a huge issue that we can’t compromise yet.
Ohohoh! Recently we were talking about HDB, and I told him I want a 5 room flat (perhaps $100K more but 20 sq m more only) and he said 4 room is more feasible and affordable for us (given our income). See, I have live over 20 years in an EA flat (literally a 6 room) while he stays in a new 4 room flat (which is rly small…) and I kinda insisted on 5 room flat. But I decided to compromise to a 4 room because..he is right. We can’t live comfortably in a 5 room flat given our income, and it’s paying more for space we don’t really need/use. So 4 room would be suffice. Compromising to a level where you don’t feel you like you lose out alot.
There are sure many more things to share but *memory not good* so yes this is one incident I remember. It’s not easy to ‘give in’ but lose the argument not the person. Only after so many try and error, I finally understand the meaning of it.
See the thing is, there are times where it’s okay to compromise but there are also times where you shouldn’t because it feels like you deserve more than you should. It’s very hard to gauge properly but remember whichever path you choose: compromising or insisting your way, DO NOT REGRET YOUR DECISIONS.
And whatever you picked, don’t ever say like “I shouldn’t have compromised to you!” Or that “I should have went my way instead of compromising to you!” Etc etc. Because word hurts more than not compromising in the first place. Really…
Humans have feelings, and we would be upset when being said nasty (not so nice) things to. And we tend to questions ourselves more, and it’s bad. It’s really bad.
So, make the decisions yourself and not blame others for the consequences of your own decisions. Hope this post makes sense. Half of the time I worry that no one understands me. Hahahaha.